If I Say So Myself

Today I realised, I’m not good enough
At a time when things were looking up
But this is not just doubt resurfacing
It’s the nature of the business we’re serving in

I’m torn and I’m angry
Directed towards those standing with me 
Why did you build me up to greatness?
Why did you not show me what a fall from grace is?

If I was as great as we both say
Then how comes I fail to grace these pages
Fail to win these competitions I’m entering
I built my ego from amateurs liking and commenting

Stoked the flames but I haven’t set the world alight
If I can’t ignite these lines, then I seldom might
I’m a writer, who built his name
But the fan base that remains, is still the same

You read these words I craft with ink
Intricate weaving in and out of rhyme schemes
Techniques that you can’t overtly see
Real poetry that I wrote with speed

And that’s only if I say so myself
Overestimate my impact on the world
Because today I realised I’m not good enough
If I was, many more would be looking me up

 

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